More Children’s Books That Should be Banned
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Hop on Pop
Reason: Promotes family violence.
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Harold and the Purple Crayon
Reason: Encourages vandalism and defacing of public property.
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Mike Mulligan and his Steam Shovel
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Reason: Stereotypes hard-working Irish-American immigrants.
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Green Eggs and Ham
Reason: Biased against mice, foxes, and goats.
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Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing
Reason: Unnecessary cruelty towards turtles (when Fudge eats one).
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Curious George Goes to the Hospital
Reason: Gratuitous use of hallucinogenic drugs (when George sniffs the ether).
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Go Dog Go!
Reason: Not only glorifies dangerous street racing, but depicts irresponsible use of non-renewable petroleum resources, thus helping contribute to global warming and rising sea levels.
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Tags: banned books, children's books, humor
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September 28, 2010 at 10:12 pm
No wonder why I’m so corrupted today.
September 28, 2010 at 10:47 pm
How about “Wee Friar Makes a Nuclear Bomb?”
September 28, 2010 at 11:49 pm
AHAHAHAHA!! This is hilarious! I’ve been seeing posts like this around and I love them. The Harold one made me laugh aloud. And Go Dog Go did, too!
September 29, 2010 at 8:33 pm
I think we should ban reading altogether.
Or maybe only reading motivational posters should be allowed.
September 29, 2010 at 10:46 pm
@tsterling
Just think of what we could have accomplished in life, if only someone would have protected us from such subversive filth.
@CaptainPush
I could not, would not build a bomb.
I would not dare. Don’t tell my Mom!
@Steph
Other posts? Darn! I hope I didnt’ copy-cat anyone!
What’s scary, is that means there are others that think like me!
@Zhu
Inspirational posters. Oh, yeah. I can write those too.
http://deepfriar.wordpress.com/2008/04/29/motivational-posters-part-ii/
September 30, 2010 at 12:59 pm
Wee Friar,
My sincerest apologies for warping your childhood. I was brainwashed by the latest books. I should have read you more fairy tales. You would have kissed a dead woman and lived happily ever after.
I’m curious if “Fox in Sox” and “Are you my mother?” should also be banned, and why?
October 1, 2010 at 7:21 am
@Friar’s Mom
Oh, I remember reading those fairy tales too. Now I have a warped view of the world, that woman are either helpless and need to be rescued, and that the only way they can be empowered is to be a witch.
They shoulda banned those books too. Maybe I wouldn’t be still single.
October 1, 2010 at 7:11 pm
I got nothing other than to say that its not the books you read as a child that keep the women away, its the constant smell of dead fish.
Eyeteaguy
October 28, 2010 at 4:42 am
Another great list but my chief concern with Harold is that his purple crayon reminds me too much of the purple crayon in the film “Sybil” with Sally Field.
That one will ruin any love you had left for purple crayons.
October 28, 2010 at 7:42 am
Even though “Sybil” has been around for 35 years, I’ve never gotten around to watching it. Just one of those things.
I supposed I should be glad, though. My fond memories of Harolds purples crayon remain intact.
November 6, 2010 at 10:13 am
I like your ski art. I have a couple pieces on this site. I also like your blog and thoughts on your need to doodle. I can relate.