Beatle Songs that Suck
Before I ruffle any feathers (like when I wrote about Bob Dylan), let me just say that I’m a HUGE Beatles fan.
At the risk of being labeled a heretic, though, I’ll go out on a limb and say that not everything the Fab Four touched necessarily turned into gold. Seems we always hear about their hits, but we never hear about their flops.
Here are some of their songs that didn’t quite make the Top Ten.
Hold Me Tight
This one’s found on the B-side of With the Beatles. And boy, does it ever SUCK.
Worst. Beatle Song. Ever.
They sound like another band trying to impersonate the Beatles, and doing poor job of it.
Hold Me Tight just goes on and ON. You wish it would just end already.
….Hold me tight, feels so right, etc. etc.. (Okay…Okay…I GET IT!)
Well, to be fair, this one WAS early in their career.
McCartney considered it a “work song”. Lennon’s comment was that he “was never really interested in it either way”. (*)
Within You Without You
Many consider Sergeant Pepper to be one of the most innovative and influential rock albums of all time. I tend to agree: the album is excellent.
Most of the album, that is…
I make an exception with George Harrison’s interminable sitar solo. I can’t believe John and Paul gave him so much album space for something that at best, is a soundtrack for a low-budget Bollywood movie.
(Thanks for coming out, George, but I think we’ll pass on that whole Eastern-music-mysticism thing).
I always found this song such a pain in the ass…this was the part of the album when I’d always have to get up at and fast-forward to the next song.
(YES…I know I’m dating myself!…This was back in the Dark Ages before CD’s or i-pods).
I’m okay with 98% of this one. But then there’s that short 5-second clip, where they actually allowed Yoko Ono to SING.
That alone ruins the song (if not the entire White Album).
It’s funny, how whenever people want to criticize Paul McCartney, they always bring up this song as a prime example of his worst work. I think it’s become one of the most hated Beatle songs ever.
I was neutral at first. The tune wasn’t great, but I wouldn’t turn it off if I heard it played.
But that was before those Classic Rock stations kept playing the damned song over and over, and beating it half to death. That was probably the tipping point…
Now when I hear Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da, I have to resist the urge to drive into on-coming traffic.
Good Morning, Good Morning
Another dud from Sergeant Pepper’s. The song itself is average-mediocre, but it’s the the end that kills me.
That’s when the music fades, and they start the sound effects of screeching barnyard animals.
Okay, maybe back in the LSD-hazed days of 1967, this was considered novel, because no one had ever put these sounds on a record before.
But it’s 2008 now, and let’s call a spade a spade…this is just plain God-awful NOISE.
Lennon later described this song a “piece of garbage” (*).
At least you gotta admire his honesty.
What a bunch of tortured-intellectual avant-garde performance art CRAP.
Could someone please explain to me what is appealing about a series random sounds stuck together, while some dick-wad drones on about “Number Nine…Number Nine…” ?
Over a twenty-five year period, I think I might have listened to this abomination, beginning-to-end, maybe TWICE. And that’s enough for this lifetime, thank you very much.
John…John…John…WHAT were you thinking?
Obviously, Yoko had a hand in this.
Wild Honey Pie
This one is so bad, I can’t describe it. You have to hear it to believe it.
What that hell….?!?
No, seriously…WHAT THE HELL ?!?!
The equivalent of Hey Jude or Let it Be, this one is NOT.
Similar to Good Morning Good Morning, it’s the last minute of the song that’s the worst. John and Paul banter between themselves as the music fades. Then Paul barks like a dog and John ad-libs, telling him to sit and be quiet. This is followed by maniacal laughter that sounds like a wheezing epileptic seizure instead.
Just plain embarrassing.
What goes on
Ringo sings in this one and harmonizes with the others. And surprisingly, he doesn’t do a bad job of it, either.
But listen to the lead guitar.
George….ummm…exactly WHAT were you trying to do there? He sounds like a confused twelve-year-old learning to play a new instrument.
Hard to believe that this was the same guy, who four years later, came up with “Something” and “Here comes the Sun“.
No, this isn’t the classic pop hit that Rod Stewart sang. It’s a traditional Liverpool folk song about a hooker robbing a sailor.
This forgettable ditty is found on the Let it Be album. One suspects it’s a remnant from the cutting-room floor. Producer Phil Spector probably stuck it in as filler material at the last minute.
The song is only about 40 seconds long, and it sounds like an off-key drunken rehearsal sung in a pub. (My favorite is Ringo trying to consistently harmonize a few beats too late.)
On top of that, the song doesn’t even end properly: everyone seemed to just randomly stop playing when they felt like it, with the tape reel still running. It’s like they suddenly stopped giving a shit.
I think 40 seconds of silence would have been better than this.
But Maggie Mae is so bad, it’s almost funny. Maybe that’s why they kept it on the album: for comic relief.
(*) Steve Turner, “A Hard Day’s Write”, Prospero Books (1999).Friar's Grab Bag
Tags: Beatles, Beatles suck, Bob Dylan, Bungalow Bill, George Harrison, Hold me Tight, humor, John Lennon, Let it Be, Paul McCartney, rant, Revolution Number Nine, Ringo Starr, Sergeant Pepper, White Album, Wild Honey Pie, Yoko OnoYou can comment below, or link to this permanent URL from your own site.