Limited Time Offer: Learn SEO with this Certified On-Line Blog Course
THE UNIVERSITY OF BLOGO-LAND
Proudly presents the
U.B.L. Certified Master’s Diploma
Taught by the Illustrious Dr. Friar. (Ph.D, M.Sc, P.B.S, F.U.Bar, Ei-Ei-Oh)
- Self-Awareness 101: Learn why your opinion is so God-damned important that the Blogosphere cannot possibly survive without you.
- The Fundamentals of Food Martyrdom: Laser-focusing your productivity by neglecting to to eat and sleep.
- Smugness 101: Why it’s not us, it’s the REST of the non-blogging world that doesn’t “get it”.
- Nutrition Awareness: Learn about the Four Basic Blogger Food Groups: sugar, salt, caffeine, and fat.
- Open Forum: Should you really be reading 500 blogs a day? (Damn right, you should!) We tell you why.
- The joys of self-actualization: Giving up that miserable 9-to-5 cubicle job, in exchange for a stress-free 85-hour workweek being your own boss.
- Open Forum: SEO. How often should we mention it? Every post? Or every 2nd post?
- Network Approach to Brown-Nosing: How to maximize your traffic by sucking up to the other Über-Bloggers
- Overcoming Anxiety: That big yellow thing up in the sky. It’s called THE SUN. (Try to get out more.)
- E-book Case Study: How I earned $1200 in one night….then nothing for the next 28 months.
- Support Group: Dealing with the guilt of missing a post. (Paramedics available upon request.)
- Addiction Counseling: Twitter: Is it the new Crack Cocaine?
- Achieving Financial Independence: Convincing your spouse to work full-time to support you, while you pull in a whopping four-figure salary.
- Couples Counselling: Do I want a relationship with my blog? Should I break up? Or should we just be good friends?
- Advanced Navel-gazing: Who are we? Why do we blog? How does this fit in with the Grand Unified Field Theory?
- Video Demonstration: Yoga techniques designed to get your head out of your arse (Prerequisite: Advanced Navel Gazing).
- Vacation Tips: Finding discount tickets to Lah-Lah Land, and staying there as long as necessary.
- Open Forum Discussion: Benfits/downfalls of wearing Depends. (When is it okay to leave your computer to go to the bathroom?)
- Filling the Void: How to blog about blogging without actually writing anything of any substance.
- Learning to prioritize. Blogging. Blogging. Blogging. And more blogging.
- Intro to Divorce Law: How to keep custody of your lap-top after your spouse leaves you for blogging too much.
Note: This course is available for a LIMITED TIME only.
The price today is $225.17.
But by NEXT FULL MOON, it will double triple quadrulple to $900.68
KIDS!!! For the LOVE OF GOD…!
SIGN UP for Dr. Friar’s Course!
If you don’t, you’ll REGRET it for the REST of your God-Forsaken Miserable EXCUSE for A LIFE!
If you DON’T BELIEVE US, check out these ASTOUNDING Testimonials from ACTUAL written text!
– Professor F. Meigh. University of Uptown on the Chudleigh.
“Read this…and it will make you cry”
– Oprah Mom
“That Dr. Friar. That guy…what a character!”
– Ölaf ThuynderFrûcken
“After taking this course, I feel that it was money spent”
– Dick Weed
“…much more pleasant than sitting in a dentists’ chair, if they don’t use Novocain”.
– Fallopia M. Ornice.