Blogging Commenter Stereotypes
Take your pick. These Empaths will burst into tears at the slightest mention of love, spouses, children, life, death, health, sickness, a motivational quote, a poem, chocolate or Oprah. Makes you wonder how some people handled Real Life before the internet.
Like two kids in a schoolyard who don’t get along. They’ll visit your blog, pick a fight with each other, trash the living room, and then leave the place a mess.
Makes a smart-ass comment, encourages others to follow, and ends up derailing your whole comment thread. Sometimes tag-teams with another hijacker, in which case, you might as well just hand over the keys to your blog, and come back tomorrow.
Comes by once every 6 months, leaves one comment, and then goes away again. (Uhhh…okay. Thanks for showing up!)
Comments a little bit too much, perhaps. Or the comments are a bit edgy..to the point of scaring off your other readers. (This is why I’m glad I don’t use my real name on my blog!)
Someone will have a tantrum and start to lose it. They might even verbally abuse other bloggers, before self-destructing in a major snit-fit. This doesn’t happen too often, but when it does, it’s very entertaining to watch.
Constantly provides obscure quotes or artsy literature references to help emphasize the point they’re trying to make. (Oooh, look at me, I’m well-read!)
Can’t comment, without including the following statement: “If we only (fill in the blank) a little bit more, we can make a difference, and the world will be a better place“. (Thanks for that…now go back to crunching your granola.)
Their comment is so long, it might as well be a whole blog post itself! (Get off the fence, already. Tell us how you REALLY feel!)
They’ll apologize for not commenting sooner. That’s because they feel obliged to follow 500 blogs and comment on each and every one.
You poke fun at something which (God Forbid) might not be PC. Everyone thinks it’s hilarious, except for the Cry-baby, of course, who takes offense. There one in every crowd. (Wah.)
The Wise Philosopher
They’ll often start a debate, in an attempt to try to make the other person “think” and see both sides of the story. Because they know better than the rest of us (or at least, they think they do).
Doesn’t matter what you write. They’ll tell you “Oh, yes…thank you for this wonderful post. It changed my life! I so TOTALLY agree! I’m going to follow your advice RIGHT NOW!“. You’re not sure if they’re sincere or not. But if you combine the Apple-Polisher with the Kleenex-Boxer, watch out and prepare to get soaked in estrogen-tears.
The Cool Kids
The Apple Polisher’s goal is graduate to this next level. The Cool Kids comment using code-words and inside jokes that only the other Cool Kids know about. They’re obviously quite pleased to be within the Sacred Inner Circle, and they like to let you know it.
The Class Clown
They dont’ really care what your post is about. All they want to do is to make make everyone else ROFOL or LOL. They often work in co-operation with the Hi-Jackers.
The Mutual Admiration Society
This is where the commenter and the blogger get into a group hug, and won’t let go. Watch for the following dialogue:
“You’re the best.”
“No…YOU’RE the best..” (ad infinitum)
(Gagggg! Where are my air-sickness bags?)
They like to leave snarky comments, but without the smiley-face emoticons. So you’re never sure if they’re taking a shot at you, or just having fun. I never could figure these people out…they sure do keep you on your toes…guessing.
Cheech (or Chong)
Like you know when you get these comments in one long sentence without any punctuation and it’s like the persons’ been smoking weed or is drunk and they’re so brain dead they’re just rambling out random thoughts in no coherent order man I really hate comments like that they just annoy me so much but it’s all part of blogging I guess so we just have to accept it you know like whatever?
I feel sorry for these people. They’re new to blogging. They’ll visit and leave sincere comments and try to take part in the discussion. But they’re often ignored, especially by the Cool Kids.
Maybe they just need to polish a few more apples.