Blogging for Nickels…

blog-nickel

I wish I had a nickel for every blog I read that…

…gives me a list of  “tips” on how I can improve my life.
Seems everyone’s an expert on the subject, except me.

…kicks me in the arse, because I haven’t self-actualized and fulfilled all my dreams yet.
(Because like I said, everyone’s an expert on how to run my own life, except me).   What they don’t mention is: it really helps to have a spouse or significant other who holds down a day job, allowing you to sit at home all day and blog.

…tells me how easy it is to make money blogging
Notice nobody ever says how MUCH money they make, or how many hours they have to put in to earn it?  (Methinks if it sounds too good to be true, it probably IS).

…posts a cutesy photo of their kids,
Which of course will trigger an avalanche of estrogen, as adoring moms come out of the woodwork, and gush over how adorable the little rug-rat is.

…is a link post
Always a sure winner, when someone doesn’t know what to write about on their own.

…cites a famous quote
Why do we constantly obsess over what everyone ELSE has said?    Can’t we think on our own?  Just because someone’s a millionaire, or a dead poet, doesn’t necessarily mean their word is as good as gold.  (How do we know these people didn’t beat their dog or were addicted to Meth or something?)

…states the blatantly obvious, and passes it off as wisdom
I really love it when bloggers feel they need to explain “No-Duh” things,  like “eating and sleeping properly is important”.  And then everyone else chimes in at how wonderful this new-found information is.

Thank you…(sob).  THANK YOU!

How did we EVER survive before Blogo-Land was around impart these pearls of wisdom to us?

What next? Remember to continue to keep breathing to sustain life?

…moves someone to tears
20 years ago, seems people only cried at weddings or funerals.   Nowadays, all it takes is for someone quote a few lines from a poem, and then WAAAHHH!  Watch the Kleenex fly!

If we ever had to fight the equivalent of World War II again, this time, I think we’d lose.

…mentions Twitter
It’s the latest Flavor-of-the-Month.   (Notice we hardly hear about S.E.O. anymore?)

…is Vegetarian
Aren’t there any Meat-Eaters anymore?

…tells me how to write, but never provides any actual examples.
God forbid, should we ever see an original short story or some poetry.

…blogs about how to blog.
Boy.  Talk about a self-fulfilling hobby.

…sells an E-book, which tells you how to make money by selling E-books
(Ponzi would be proud).

…encourages professional wannabees.
Sorry.  Just because you can string together 250 words on what the cat puked up for breakfast does not necessarily make you a WRITER.  Neither does posting lame-ass digital photographs make you a PHOTOGRAPHER.     (I think it takes a little bit more than that consider yourself a professional).

…takes itself way too seriously
Seems that for every funny blog, there’s about fifty that are not.   We’re so damned busy coaching and inspiring each other, we’ve forgotten our sense of humor.    We need to lighten up and LAUGH!  (Life’s too short!)

…bitched about other blogs, as much as The Deep Friar does.
😉

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38 Comments on “Blogging for Nickels…”

  1. feefifoto Says:

    Friar, you know I usually agree with you, and at the risk of coming across as a brown-noser, I have to agree with you on this list, but I’m curious: what types of blog posts would you read for free? Because you seem to have covered most of what’s out there.

  2. Friar Says:

    @fee
    Well, I seem to have covered most of what’s out there, within my blog circle. Maybe I need to expand more.

    I’ve been trying to find more blog posts that have humor in them. There ARE some out there..but I find they’re few and far-between.

    I’m also a big fan of creativity…people presenting their own original personal work (i.e. painting, writing, stories, etc). Just something ORIGINAL, that no one else has done, that isn’t repeated umpteen times everywhere else.

    Again..there ARE blogs like that, including lots of visitors to the Deep Friar. (I won’t list them all here, at the risk of offending any I might leave off the list). But these again, tend to be harder to find.


  3. There’s not enough money in the world to cover all these blogs…thankfully, my journal is not one of them. Whew!

  4. Karen JL Says:

    I wish I had a nickel for every time Friar bitched about other bloggers.

    What a windfall that would be. 😉

  5. Friar Says:

    @matthew
    No…I must admit…your blog is quite unique! You don’t fall in any of these categories.

    @Karen
    Who….ME? Whatever do you MEAN? 😮

  6. Friar Says:

    @Karen

    Actually, your last comment was so good, I had to add it to the list! (Who sez I can’t laugh at myself?) 😀

  7. Hannah Says:

    I’m a vegetarian blogger, but don’t post about it constantly and we’re not as numerous as you believe.
    Trust me, as soon as I post on the subject, lots of carnivores chime in with “I could NEVER be a vegetarian. Hmm, meat!” LOL. Which is fine, I love all my bloggy friends, regardless of diet. 🙂

  8. Kyddryn Says:

    Umm…maybe you should avoid my blog..I’m pretty sure I’ve done some of those things. Except anything about making money, being a good writer, and how to blog – I can’t manage those for myself, how the heck would I advise others on the subjects??

    Also, just so you know – I eat meat. Yummy. Just had some last night, gonna get me some for lunch today, argh, grunt, ungowa…

    Shade and Sweetwater,
    K (who is grinning unrepentantly just now)

  9. Kelly Says:

    Friar,

    Ponzi: AGREED. Heartily.

    I’m guilty on several charges. Laughing and agreeing with you, but guilty.

    On the other hand, I try to make success sound like a slow-and-steady (and frankly, kinda difficult) thing, and I don’t go for make-money-online posts, so maybe I redeem myself somewhat on that count. 🙂

    Nobody bitches like you bitch. Why should anyone else try?

    Regards,

    Kelly

  10. XUP Says:

    I often do blogs on tips on how to improve your life, but they’re all mock tips, so I don’t actually do any of the things on your list and as an added bonus I have posted 3 short stories, but nobody had the time or energy to read them so I stopped doing that.

  11. Brett Legree Says:

    You forgot my favourite one.

    …sells evaporating information.

    I mean, I know it’s a sales and marketing tactic, but “BUY NOW! before the price triples on Thursday, and if you don’t buy it before Friday IT IS GONE FOR GOOD!!!”

    Gee, I’ve always wondered then how some authors (e.g. Cory Doctorow) can *give away* the full text of their books, allowing you to print it (unaltered of course) using a service like Lulu and even allowing you to SELL THE BOOK for a profit – and yet, they are able to sell enough books via their own publishers to make a decent living.

    Basically what I’m saying is… if a science fiction author can give away his writing, when all it is essentially is a made up story that can’t make you rich, why is it that the technical e-books or whatever can’t use this same model?

    Is it because the authors of said books know that what they are selling is very thin and once the secret is out they won’t sell anything again?

    I know this might tick off a few people, but I just think it is worth saying.

    Put it another way – I have bought software before that I did not have to buy – it was freely available, legally even, but the creators asked for donations if you liked the software. So I sent money to the ones I liked.

  12. Eyeteaguy Says:

    Ahhh, that’s more like it! Smart-ass, witty and pisses people off! Great post!

    There is no other blog like this on the net. And if someone ever tries to compete with you? I will DoS attack them! Heh, heh, heh. Bretty will help me I’m sure.

    Most of the other blogs I read are quite boring and technical so its nice to come here for a visit. I can say what I want without the risk of being banned. (Yes, I have been banned from a blog before, people can be so sensitive! But he really was an ass, and wrong.)

    Eyeteaguy

    P.S. Don’t ban me please. Or I’ll DoS you too, with or without Bretty’s help.

  13. Kelly Says:

    *raises hand* ‘Scuse me…

    DoS you? What’s that?

  14. Eyeteaguy Says:

    @Kelly, when will you learn to use Wikipedia?

    A denial-of-service attack (DoS attack) or distributed denial-of-service attack (DDoS attack) is an attempt to make a computer resource unavailable to its intended users. Although the means to carry out, motives for, and targets of a DoS attack may vary, it generally consists of the concerted efforts of a person or persons to prevent an Internet site or service from functioning efficiently or at all, temporarily or indefinitely. Perpetrators of DoS attacks typically target sites or services hosted on high-profile web servers such as banks, credit card payment gateways, and even root nameservers.

    One common method of attack involves saturating the target (victim) machine with external communications requests, such that it cannot respond to legitimate traffic, or responds so slowly as to be rendered effectively unavailable. In general terms, DoS attacks are implemented by either forcing the targeted computer(s) to reset, or consuming its resources so that it can no longer provide its intended service or obstructing the communication media between the intended users and the victim so that they can no longer communicate adequately.

    Ta-Da!

  15. Kelly Says:

    Eyeteaguy,

    ROFL. Right after Friar does. A search of the ‘net is usually my first line of defense but honestly I didn’t even think of it this time.

    DoS attack. Maybe that’s what’s happened to my comment section. Though I haven’t got any external communication, either…

    I’m still using it as my excuse. I’ll sound so delightfully geeky. And clueless, at the same time. 🙂

    Until later,

    Kelly

  16. Friar Says:

    @Hannah
    Just so long as Vegetarians don’t get too high and mighty and start preaching to me, I’m fine with them.

    And actually, I enjoy eating veggie meals (just not ALL the time!) 🙂

    Kyddryn

    Ungowa. Heh heh heh. I haven’t’ heard THAT one for a while!

    Me Tarzan. Ungowa. 🙂

    @Kelly
    Oh, I supsected I might have risked ruffling a few feathers with you, because you always post an interesting quote on Wednesdays.

    But you’ve redeemed yourself, because those days seem to have the best comment discussions (which often as not, have nothing to do with the actual quote!)

    @XUP
    On rare occasions, I try to write something “real”. Maybe an autobiographal story. Maybe even something sad or touching. I think that’s been some of my best writing, actually.

    But unfortuntately those posts are the ones that end up the least-read. Go figure.

    @Brett
    Heh heh. What do you call that again…Vapor-Ware?

    Some of these E-books have a “best before date”, like you and I were talking bout the other day. Within a few years, they’ll totally be obsolete, because the exsiting Blog applications will no longer be relevant.

    Unlike a story book or picture book, that can still be enjoyed 20 years from now.

    And that “Honesty Box” in an interesting concept seems to gaining popularity. Give stuff away, and let people pay what they think it’s worth.

    Just like Chapter’s bookstore. They let you read inside the store, and even encourage it. And you end up buying the books anyway.

  17. Friar Says:

    @Eyeteaguy
    Heh heh. I KNEW you’d like this post.

    And I would NEVER ban you. It just wouldn’t be the same if you weren’t here.

    @Kelly
    Not to self: never ban Eyeteaguy (or anyone else who knows how to DoS).


  18. See you don’t need all those self help blogs. Just subscribe to my philosophy. Be my friend, or else. And when you are with me, you must have fun.

    “And I would NEVER ban you. It just wouldn’t be the same if you weren’t here.” -Awwww, you say the sweetest things. I’m going to go barf now.

    Eye(spew)guy

  19. Friar Says:

    @Eyeteaguy

    Even if I DID ban you, you’d probably find a way to hack in again!


  20. Probably, I’m evil that way.

  21. Brett Legree Says:

    You’re an evil bastard, Eyeteaguy.

    That’s why I like you.

  22. Friar Says:

    Brett and Eyeteaguy

    Maybe I can get you two to hack into each other…!!


  23. Bin-Dare, Dun-Dat. Our arab cousin.

  24. Kelly Says:

    “But unfortuntately those posts are the ones that end up the least-read.”

    Maybe, but those loyal souls who read those posts, read ’em twice to make up for it.

    🙂

  25. Friar Says:

    @Eyeteaguy

    Arab cousin? Huh? (Am I missing an inside joke here?)

    @Kelly
    Well,I really appreciate the people who take time to read those posts!

    (I know it throws people for a loop, though…when Friar gets “serious”) 🙂

  26. Friar's Mom Says:

    @ Kelly

    I agree with Eyeteaguy, learn to use Wikipedia. Better still, just Google what you’re looking for. When I first started read Comments of Friar’s Blog, I was completely Blog-illiterate. You see, I come from another generation. I had to research Google to find the meaning of ROFL, LMAO, and yes, OMG.

    I too didn’t understand Eyeteaguy’s DoS attack, but Google came up with lots of websites.

    @ Kyddryn

    Do you mean Ungowa as in “To command someone to quit speaking”?
    Or do you mean Ungawa as in “The word Tarzan used to speak to animals”?

    @ Eyeteaguy

    Just for fun I looked up Bin Dare, Dun Dat to see if those words really existed. You may not believe this, but there’s a trucking and excavating company in Prince George, British Columbia, called Bin-Dare Dun-Dat Excavating. I kid you not.


  27. Yikes. I guess I am in there somewhere.

    You are making me paranoid Friar.And there was me about to mention Twitter in another post.

  28. Friar Says:

    @Three Dog Blogger

    Actually, I don’t think you fall in any of those categories.

    You might show cutesy photos of your critters once in a while, but I’m a dog-lover, so that’s okay! 🙂

  29. Eyeteaguy Says:

    Friar, let me spell it out for you.

    1. You said “Maybe I can get you two to hack into each other…!!”
    2. I said “Bin-Dare, Dun-Dat” Loosely translated as Been there and done that. As in (Big Bad) Brett and I have already hacked eacher other to death… in the purely electronic sense.
    3. You Mom’s response is both scarey and funny.
    a) scarey-she agrees with me. I wish people would cut that out.
    b) there is a company called Bin-Dare Dun-Dat Excavating. I love it!

    Eyeteaguy

  30. Friar Says:

    @Eyeteaguy

    Yeah, I’m getting a lot of amusement watching Friar’s Mom overcome her initial shyness, and start exchanging quips with others, especially you. 🙂

  31. Eyeteaguy Says:

    Quips? Have to check Wikipedia, BRB.

    Redirected to Wit. Wikipedia is bang on again.
    “Wit is a form of intellectual humour. A wit (person) is someone skilled in making witty remarks. Forms of wit include the quip and repartee.”

    I shall reply with a repartee then. In fact I think I just did.

    Eyeteaguy


  32. […] Blogging for Nickels… at The Deep Friar […]

  33. Writer Dad Says:

    “If we ever had to fight the equivalent of World War II again, this time, I think we’d lose.”

    True that!

    I’m guilty of some of these charges, though not too many, and still think it’s hilarious. Right on, Friar.

  34. asrais Says:

    So much indeed.

    I stop reading most blogs because I don’t believe the authors themselves believe their own words.

    People read all these blogs because they fail to realize the answer isn’t out there. It is within themselves.

  35. Friar Says:

    @Writer Dad
    On the other hand, if WWII happened today, maybe it would give us something REAL to worry about, and we wouldnt’ have time to navel-gaze so much.

    And yes…you DO post cutesy pictures of your kids. But you’re one of the few bloggers that actually WRITES stories and poetry, so you’re excused! 🙂

    @John
    Brilliant? Not necessarily. But smart-ass? For sure! 😉

    @asrais
    What you just said in that last sentence makes perfect sense.

    Now, if you want to join all the other dime-a-dozen nickel-bloggers, just take that thought, and explain it over and over again, 25 more times. 😉

  36. seanmp1 Says:

    Thanks for the excuse, teach! It also took me seven months to post a single photo if that gives me any extra credit. : > )

  37. Friar Says:

    @Writer Dad

    …you’ve obviously been making up for lost time! 😉


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