They leave a Tweet every 5 minutes, for hours on end. Doesn’t matter if anyone answers them or not..they’ll do it anyway. You wonder if these people have day-jobs.
“Hey, check out my new blog and http.tinyurl/lookitme.com.“
( Most of us are guilty of this one, occasionally..including yours truly).
“Hey, check out my friend’s blog at http.tinurl/buy-my-shit.com. Buy their product, so you can be cool, just like me.”
(Makes you wonder if they work on commission…?)
The Cool Kids
Unfortunately, the Cool Kids from Blogo-Land have established a beachhead in TwitterLand, and are here to stay. …Whatever.
The Free-Lance Martyrs
We can tweet about what we ate for breakfast, and we’ll call it wasting time. The Martyrs will spend 3 hours a day doing the same, and they’ll call it “Work”. (Even though it never generates any revenue and never gains them any new clients.)
Kind of like the carpet-bomber, only with less tweets. Just wants to be noticed. “Hello. Anybody there? Anybody?…”
Pick a time. Any time. Log on randomly. 6:00 AM. Midnight. They’ll BE THERE. (My God, don’t these folks ever sleep?)
“OMG…Sorry, I had to leave for a few minutes, to drop off my Mom at Emerg. She had a heart attack. But I”m back now. Did I miss anything? Huh? What did I miss?”
As in Bartlett”s Quotations. That’s all these bozos do: cite one famous quote after another. Only they never answer back, or initiate any discussion. It’s just a one-way conversation. (Wow…how ORIGINAL.)
Same as the Bartletts. Only instead of providing just quotes, they’ll also tell you what songs they’re listening to, or what blogs they’re reading, or what color socks they’re wearing. And of course, they won’t talk back to anybody, either. It’s a monologue: they just want you to shut up and LISTEN.
Talk about an ego trip.
Like Remoras on sharks, they’ll latch onto the Oracles, hanging on every single word they say, like it’s the Sermon of the Mount or something.
They’ll have thousands of followers. I can’t conceive how anyone can follow such a converation, but they apparently do. It probably helps to be a Troglodyte.
The Self-Perpetuating Twits
They’ll refer you to such interesting sites, such as “Maximizing your Twitter Efficiency to Increase your Blog Traffic In orer to Optimize your Twitter Followers”.
Yawn. Dude. You need to get a new hobby.
Seems to be an ample supply of lucky winners who’ve received lap-tops, and now want to tell me how I can do the same. And according to the avatars, these people always seem to be gorgeous babes.
But that’s just pure coincidence, right?
Those who openly dare to make fun of Twitter. (Very few and far between.)
I wish there were more.