More Children’s Books That Should be Banned

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a

Hop on Pop

Reason: Promotes family violence.

a

Harold and the Purple Crayon

Reason: Encourages vandalism and defacing of public property.

a

Mike Mulligan and his Steam Shovel

r

Reason: Stereotypes hard-working Irish-American immigrants.

r

Green Eggs and Ham

Reason: Biased against mice, foxes, and goats.

a

Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing

Reason: Unnecessary cruelty towards turtles (when Fudge eats one).

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Curious George Goes to the Hospital

Reason: Gratuitous use of hallucinogenic drugs (when George sniffs the ether).

a

Go Dog Go!

Reason: Not only glorifies dangerous street racing, but depicts irresponsible use of non-renewable petroleum resources, thus helping contribute to global warming and rising sea levels.

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12 Comments on “More Children’s Books That Should be Banned”

  1. t. sterling Says:

    No wonder why I’m so corrupted today.

  2. CaptainPush Says:

    How about “Wee Friar Makes a Nuclear Bomb?”

  3. steph Says:

    AHAHAHAHA!! This is hilarious! I’ve been seeing posts like this around and I love them. The Harold one made me laugh aloud. And Go Dog Go did, too!

  4. Zhu Says:

    I think we should ban reading altogether.

    Or maybe only reading motivational posters should be allowed.

  5. Friar Says:

    @tsterling
    Just think of what we could have accomplished in life, if only someone would have protected us from such subversive filth.

    @CaptainPush

    I could not, would not build a bomb.
    I would not dare. Don’t tell my Mom!

    @Steph

    Other posts? Darn! I hope I didnt’ copy-cat anyone!

    What’s scary, is that means there are others that think like me! 🙂

    @Zhu
    Inspirational posters. Oh, yeah. I can write those too.

    https://deepfriar.wordpress.com/2008/04/29/motivational-posters-part-ii/

  6. Friar's Mom Says:

    Wee Friar,

    My sincerest apologies for warping your childhood. I was brainwashed by the latest books. I should have read you more fairy tales. You would have kissed a dead woman and lived happily ever after.

    I’m curious if “Fox in Sox” and “Are you my mother?” should also be banned, and why?

  7. Friar Says:

    @Friar’s Mom

    Oh, I remember reading those fairy tales too. Now I have a warped view of the world, that woman are either helpless and need to be rescued, and that the only way they can be empowered is to be a witch.

    They shoulda banned those books too. Maybe I wouldn’t be still single.

  8. Eyeteaguy Says:

    I got nothing other than to say that its not the books you read as a child that keep the women away, its the constant smell of dead fish.

    Eyeteaguy

  9. Posky Says:

    Another great list but my chief concern with Harold is that his purple crayon reminds me too much of the purple crayon in the film “Sybil” with Sally Field.

    That one will ruin any love you had left for purple crayons.

  10. Friar Says:

    Even though “Sybil” has been around for 35 years, I’ve never gotten around to watching it. Just one of those things.

    I supposed I should be glad, though. My fond memories of Harolds purples crayon remain intact.

  11. David smith Says:

    I like your ski art. I have a couple pieces on this site. I also like your blog and thoughts on your need to doodle. I can relate.

  12. Javian Says:

    What, seriously?


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