More Pointless Random Lists…
English “or” Words that could be a good name for an alien War-Lord
Old and Tired Facebook posts
– Expressing the blatantly obvious (i.e. “We should not judge people based on their appearance“), and self-righteously patting yourself on the back for doing so.
– Coloring your avatar to show support/awareness for the latest flavor-of-the-month cause.
– Copy-pasting a quote from a dead philosopher/dead poet, to show everyone how wise and well-read you are.
– Posting a photo of yourself (if you’re a woman), so all the other women can tell you how “lovely” you look.
– Posting a photo of your meal, so everyone can tell you how “yummy” it looks.
Dialogue from the 3-year-old demon-spawn at the next table at the restaurant
– “Am…Am…Am…Am…Am…Am…AM!!! AM!!!! AMMM AMMMAMMMAMAAMAM”
– “No! No! No! No! Noooo! NOOOOOO!!!”
– “AHHHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHH!”
Modern professions that would be totally useless after a nuclear war and civilizations’ inevitable collapse
– Feng-shui consultant
– Social Media Ninja
– Auric Cleanser
– Life Coach
Modern professions that are totally useless today
– See above.
Popular Nah-Nah Songs
– Hey Jude: “Nah-Nah-Nah Nana-Nah Nahhhhh”
– Kiss him goodbye: “Nah-Nah-Nah Na, Nah-Nah-Nah Na, Hey-Ay, Good Bye”
– The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down: “Nahhh, Nana-Na Nah, Nana Nah Nanana Nahhh”
Bitchy Comic Strip Girls I Never Liked
– Lucy Van Pelt
– Violet and Patty
– Margaret Wade (Dennis the Menace’s nemesis)
– Veronica Lodge
Comic strip characters that would basically be identical, if it weren’t for slight differences in hairstyle or clothes
– Betty and Veronica
– Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse
– Jeffy/Billy/Dolly from The Family Circus.
– Blondie Bumpstead and Tootsie Woodley (right down to the cup size)
Best Bugs Bunny quotes ever
– “You better plug him again, Mac, just to make sure!”
– “Fortunately, I keep mah feathers numbered, for jest such an emergency.”
– “I must KIWWW the wabbit!”
– “What for you bury me in the cold, cold, ground?”
Uncle Friar’s tips on how to mess with dogs and get them all wound up
– Blow in their face.
– Tickle them between the pads on their feet.
– Point excitedly into the snow (“Whassat? WHASSAT?) and watch them start a digging frenzy
– In a quiet voice…come right up to their face, and ask them “Wwwwwwwwww…..WHAT????”