Friar’s Bookshelf

Posted March 12, 2014 by Friar
Categories: Friar's Grab Bag

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Friar's Bookshelf 2

Two different pens. One combined doodle.

Posted March 6, 2014 by Friar
Categories: Friar's Artwork

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2014-03-05 Doodle

Can you find (?) :

A Beatnik Bandit (google it) .   A shitting unicorn.   A squid.    A femur.   A bearded clam.   A brick.     A brick shithouse.   DNA.   A mug of crud.  A dancing pickle.  A type-T thermocouple.  A nuke.    Many stars.    A tennis ball.   A dumbass retriever-dawg.   “e” twice.   And also pi.     A speckled trout.  A Big Mac.  The letter F.   And U.   And C.   And K.  Grapefruit.   A saguaro cactus.  A curious dog.  A donut with icing. Another (non bearded) clam.   Nil.    A log.  Bacon (of course).  An annoyed rattlesnake.   A dangerous horse.   Saturn.    A Swagelok male connector. Pacman and one ghost.  An atom.  A conical section.  A tesseract.   A rude monkey.  Planck’s Constant.  Bananas.  A wise owl.  A snarky Etch-a-Sketch.    A Mercury-Redstone Rocket.  A coat hanger.  Dairy Queen.     A small sword to stab with.   Pyramid Power.   A barrel of monkeys, sans monkeys.   A grumpy Viking.   The Grapes of Wrath.  And a blender.

My Very Catholic Workbook

Posted March 6, 2014 by Friar
Categories: Friar's Grab Bag

Tags: , , ,

This goes back to my Grade 1 Religion Class  when I attended Regina Caeli Elementary School in Montreal.   (Circa 1970-71).

Cath Cover IMG_7336

“I became a Child of God on August 9th…”

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…and thus the indoctrination begins.

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I think here we were supposed to draw the gifts God gave us…

Cath 1

So why did I draw myself spraying the bugs?

I have no idea.

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“Draw something God made for us to enjoy”.

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Let me see…from left to right, there’s a kiddie pool, a fort made of blankets and lawn chairs, the neighbors cat, and me and a bike.

With the exception of the cat, these are all material possessions.

Obviously I missed the whole point, here.

Note that Mrs. McGuire gave me a “C”, which stood for “Correct”.

That was the default grade she gave:  meaning your work was adequate, but not great.

But I did get rewarded with the mandatory religious stamp.

Cath 3 Stamp

(If only I could be like that haloed boy…*sigh*).

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“Show Adam and Even when they were happy with God”

Cath 3 IMG_7309Wow…I must have really knocked this one out of the park.

Because I got the trifecta:   The standard “C” for Correct.

The bonus religious stamp of the angel:

.Cath 3 angel

And…the coveted “E” for “Excellent”.

When you got an “E”, you know you did well.

Cath 3 Excellent

Mrs. McGuire didn’t just hand those E’s to anybody, you know.

You had to EARN them.

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But Religion Class wasn’t all fun and drawings.   80% of my book was filled with text.  Apparently we did a lot of reading along and underlining.

(All part of the indoctrination process,  naturally…)

Cath Underline IMG_7327a

“Draw yourself with other people.  We are children of God”.

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Looking at this, I don’t think I was really interested in drawing myself with other people.

I just wanted to draw a green Volkswagen, which was my favorite car at the time.

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“Draw yourself helping at home”.

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Not my best work.  But obviously I was very enthralled with the vibrant pink color from my new felt pen set.

I recognize my baby brother in the crib.   But aside from that , this was a pretty shitty drawing,  even for a kid.  The walls to the left and right are just scribbled in.

Even Mrs. McGuire noticed.   I got a “V. G.” beside the “C”.

Meaning “Very Good”.  Which was one step below “Correct”.

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“Draw Noah and his family on the ark”.

Cath 05 Noah IMG_7315

It looks like I actually put a lot of thought into this one.   I got Noah’s family looking out the windows, with a few animals, including (third from the left) what appears to be an ALLIGATOR!

Cath 05 Noah Gator IMG_7315

And if that’s the case, then I think this drawing is AWESOME!

Funny thing is, I actually remember drawing this.   And remembering the story about how Noah set out three doves to look for land.   Apparently the first two drowned and never came back.  But the third one came back with an olive branch or something, and that’s who Noah found Mount Ararat.

Anyway, for whatever reason, I chose to draw one of the drowning birds.    On the roof, right next to the nonchalant giraffe. 

Cath 05 Noah Bird IMG_7315

Pretty harsh, when you think about it.

But hey…this was the Old Testament.

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What would I have said to Jesus?

“Thank you Jesus for the food.  It was good”.

Cath Food was Good IMG_7334

Which, obviously, was the right thing to say.

Because it got “Excellent”.

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“Draw Jesus with three of his Apostles”.

Cath 6 IMG_7321Yes.  Three apostles:  James, John, and qeter.

But it did earn an “Excellent”.   And not just as an “E”, but with the whole word written out.

This was rare compliment from Mrs. McGuire.

I was really starting to get the hang of this.

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“Draw Jesus and his Apostles in the  boat”

Cath 12IMG_7333

See?   I got too cocky, and here I only got a “Correct”.

Probably because I screwed up the names of the apostles, and tried to erase the lettering and got it all smudged.

I have to admit,  Mrs. McGuire was consistent and fair in her marking.

And you gotta respect that.

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“Draw some people Jesus wants you to love”

Cath 7 IMG_7323

Yeahhh….and I don’t think I really wanted to draw that.    Obviously, I preferred to draw myself building a snow fort instead.

Hence, the lesser grade of “C” instead of the coveted “E”

Geez.

You couldn’t fool ol’ Mrs. McG.

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“Pray to the Holy Spirit.  Write your prayer here”

Cath 8 IMG_7324“Thank you Jesus for going back to Heaven!”

(????)

I’m not a theological expert.   But I don’t think you’re supposed to thank Jesus for going to heaven.   You’re probably supposed to thank him for dying for your sins instead. 

But what do you want?

I was only in Grade 1.

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“Draw yourself being a child of God”.

Cath 11 IMG_7332

Wow.  Look at the size of that SUN.

Anyway, I think this was supposed to be me playing with my sister.

Because from a seven-year-old point of view, the ultimate sacrifice to God is being nice to your pesky younger siblings.

Apparently, so is cleaning your room for Jesus.

Cath 13 IMG_7335

Though I am intrigued as to why I suddenly regressed back to drawing stick-figure people.

I dunno..maybe it was some kind of “minimalist” artistic phase I was gong through.

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Here’s one of story of the Prodigal Son.

Cath 7 Prodigal IMG_7322

On the left, I drew the rich son leaving home and setting out in the wold with his big bag of cash with the dollar sign on it.

(Because the dollar was standard currency back in biblical times).

On the right, we see the son returning home, tattered and poor, falling at his farther’s feet.

Though they both look like bums…both equally tattered and poor.

(Oh well).

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“Draw yourself  saying Thank you to Jesus”

Cath 10 IMG_7330

Oooh…LOOK!   This is probably the FIRST CARTOON BUBBLE I ever drew! (Even though I ran out of room and had to add to it).

Mrs. McGuire liked it too…I got an “E”    And also (look in the top right), a colored stamp of the three Wise Men.

Cath 10 stampIMG_7330

(Awesome).

I also recognize one of the items in the background.

Cath 10 Clock IMG_7330

That’s an old Fisher-Price Clock I used to have when I was three.   I still held on to it back then.

FP Clock

It boggles my mind, how I remember this.

Don’t ask me how, but I do.

Of coures, at the end of some of the chapters, there were “take home” questions which we had go over with our parents.   My Mom and Dad would quiz me, and they’d have to sign off that they covered the material with me, and then Mrs. McGuire would co-sign it.

This information probably all went on my Permanent Record.   .

Cath Exam

This was all taken very seriously.   To ensure we kids grew up to be good little Catholics.

And it worked.  Because just 7 years later,  I became an Altar Boy

(But that’s another story).

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R.I.P. Stupid Mask That Will Not Die (1977-2014)

Posted January 25, 2014 by Friar
Categories: Friar's Grab Bag

Tags: , ,

See this stupid paper-maché mask?     I made it in Grade 7 Art Class in 1977.

0 Mask 1

I stopped caring for the Stupid Mask sometimes in the early 80′s.   As I got older, I tried to throw it out multiple times but it kept coming back.

(Thanks, Friar’s Mom).

I won’t bother you with the history…(you can read about it here).  But suffice to say,  over the few decades, I just could not get RID of this thing.

The Stupid Mask would NOT DIE.

It continued to plague me, and I thought I would never be able to move forward with my life.

Fast forward, December 2013.

Friar’s Mom was cleaning up the clutter in her house, and I guess she finally decided she wanted the Stupid Mask out of her house too.

So she wrapped it up, and gave it to my Screaming Nephew for Christmas.    

Her thinking: maybe he can amuse himself by burning it in a bonfire, or something.

Now, imagine yourself as an 11 year old boy,  who likes PlayStation DS and MineCraft and Lego, and all the other things 11-year-old boys do.

And Grandma gives you a lame-ass musty paper-maché art project that Uncle Friar did almost four decades ago.   That even Uncle Friar doesn’t like any more.

Now..how excited would you be?

The answer is:  NOT VERY MUCH.

So I offered to hold the Stupid Mask while the Screaming Nephew gave it a karate punch.

Which he gleefully did.

Stupid MaskIMG_5981

And he continued to destroy it.

And I was glad.

Stupid Mask IMG_5992

The Stupid Mask did get it’s 15 minutes of fame, though.  

It provided the Screaming Nephew some mild amusement, when we put the “scary teeth” in front of our faces.

Stupid Mask IMG_5991

Stupid MaskIMG_5980

But, eventually, the Stupid Mask had outlived it’s usefulness, and now is no more.

Stupid Mask IMG_6031

And I say….GOOD !!!

Because now I finally have closure.

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French 101: Random Phrases Overheard in a Quebec Restaurant

Posted January 16, 2014 by Friar
Categories: Friar's Grab Bag

Tags: , , ,

IMG_6095-c

“Sh-tanh Floride”  
(I was in Florida)

“ShPah Kapab…”
(I am not able to…)

“Yeh Pu Kapab…”
(He is no longer able to…)

“Nuh Nuh Non.”
(Emphatic no)

“Whye”
(Yes)

“Euh, lah, euh.,.”
(Um…well, um.,.)

“Feh-kla…”
(The fact is, there..)

“Bainh, Lah, lah…”
(Well, um, there..)

“Ah, Bainh, La, Euh…”
(Oh, well, then, there…)

 “Euhhhhhhhh”
(Ummmmmm)

“Mwhye Meh”
(Hmm.  Yes, but…)

“Tsay…”
(You know…)

“Ee bouge pu…”
(He is no longer moving…)

“Pee Lah..”
(And then, there…)

“Pee Euhhh…”
(And then, ummmmm)

“Ease cash…”
(He is hiding…)

“Yah Tawnh”
(He is waiting)

Getting Up Close and Personal

Posted January 14, 2014 by Friar
Categories: Uncategorized

Tags: , , , , , , ,

Sometimes I like to play with the macro lens on my camera and take close-up shots of my garden.

There’s no magic here.  I don’t use a tripod or anything.

I just bring the lens up close and point and click.   Technology does the rest.

Here’s a zinnia.

Close up IMG_4380a

A sunflower.

Close u FlowerIMG_3238

aPoppies.

Close uP IMG_2376 a

No idea what these are.  Close up IMG_4384a

I had to go out on the lake to get this lily pad.

Close UP IMG_3534

This was a hard photo to take.  It was  a real bitch trying to position the canoe with one hand on the the paddle, while trying to keep the camera inches away with the other.

The great thing about digital photos, is that with Photoshop you can zoom in and enlarge the picture even more.

Here are some forget-me-nots, which are only a few millimeters in diameter.

Close Up IMG_2249a Close UP IMG_2361a

Here are some individual lilac blossoms. IMG_2233 Close Up   Close up IMG_2292a

Dandelions are especially amazing.  They are now one of my favorite flowers. 

Close UP IMG_2389

If you zoom in, you see all kinds of curley-cues, which I never even knew existed until this year.

Close Up IMG_2267a

Flower IMG_2494

To give you an idea of how small these are, here’s an ant crawling through them.

Flower IMG_2488

You can see the individual grains of pollen on his back.

(Not bad for a hand-held camera).

I think this is a wild strawberry blossom.   I took this one in June near Wawa, Ontario.

Flower IMG_2504

Here are some pink wild flowers.  No idea what they are.

Pink Flowers Flowers IMG_2509

Zoomed up, it looks like some tiny yellow bears poking their head out of a cave.

Flower IMG_2500

Here’s a daisy from my back yard.

Close up Daisy IMG_3243

Zooming in shows a hexagonal matrix of pods (or whatever you call them) arranged in spiral patterns.

Close up Extrem IMG_3243

It’s all very mathematical.   Flowers like to follow Fibonacci sequence.

I once wrote a blog post about it here.

And of course, I had berries.

Raspberry IMG_3236

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Raspberry IMG_3234

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Close UP IMG_3062 - Copy

It was a good crop this year.  For a few weeks,  I’d get a bowl like this every 2 days.

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IMG_3072 Zoom

Once in a while, I also managed to get some insects.

If they’re occuppied with the flower,  I could get quite close without disturbing them.

Close UP IMG_4366

This bee could care less if I was there…she just wanted the pollen.

Close up IMG_4368a

Close UP IMG_4376

I found this fly in October while hiking in Algonquin Park.

The weather was cold, so he has kind of dopey and slow.    Which is probalby the reason I was able to bring the camera so close.

Close up IMG_5301

(Shudder!)  

Kind of creepy.

If my Grandma was alive and she saw this, she’d have a freaking heart attack.

Anyway, I’m just glad I’m hundreds of times larger than he is.

a

Monday Night Art Class: Something Different

Posted January 9, 2014 by Friar
Categories: Friar's Artwork

Tags: , , , , ,

I wanted to so something different.   So I though I’d paint this close-up photo of a dandelion, which I took last summer.

Flower IMG_2494

 

And then I decided to add geckos.

With Viking helmets.

Gecko Dandelion-S


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